‘I will marry you’, – my daughter said. Just like that, out of the blue, in the middle of our video call. In the middle of my very important sentence, probably.
‘Oh no’, – I quickly recovered from the shock. ‘If anybody marries you, that’s me’.
London boy kept watching us, smile on his face.
I can’t believe we’ve come to this. I adore the guy. And my daughter adores him just as much. We are two crazy girls, and London boy’s biggest fans.
When I tell my girl I think about her all the time, she replies that she does too, she thinks about me and London boy all the time. Can you imagine? I’ve cared for my girl for 6 years. Yet this handsome guy shows his face once and he’s won her heart. He’s won mine, too.
I feel like all of my life I’ve been searching for love.
And when I find it, there’s nothing bigger or better, nothing that matters more. I see nothing, hear nothing, say nothing. All I know is love.
The love that I have for my daughter is the strongest feeling ever. I did not think it was possible to have so much love for one person. To be honest, I constantly feel like a pot that’s boiling over. My love is so big it can’t be contained. It spills over, becomes a sticky mess, turns brown, but it can’t be stopped.
The love I have felt for the men in my life has been equally big. I adored Beno. I adore London boy. And no other man comes even close.
I try, because at the end of the day this love is a one way street. And I am smart enough to see it. However, my heart rules my mind. If I decide to leave London boy for good one day, I text him the next. ‘It’s not me’, – I tell him. ‘My fingers are typing the message’.
I know him. I don’t need to pretend around him. He’s seen me in the pirate’s costume on Halloween, for goodness sake (and it didn’t do me justice, although the kids loved it).
And until he’s out of my life, he rules my heart.
